Tagged: Stay at home dad

The home truths of staying at home

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Shared parental leave: less of this…

It’s not a holiday!

So goes my standard response when someone asks me about my shared parental leave.

To be fair, nobody has suggested out loud that I’m spending my time with my feet up, watching Cash in the Attic on catch-up, munching Doritos and reading the papers. But the language people use suggests their thoughts are along those lines. “Enjoy your break!” was a popular phrase when I checked out of the office in November. “Make sure you don’t spend it all in the playground: get out there and achieve something with your time” another colleague told me. Continue reading

The health visitor visits

L0025727 Health Visitors' Association.

Credit: Wellcome Library, London. Health Visitors’ Association. Health care leaflets: What is a Health Visitor? Produced by Sterling Health. Copyrighted work available under Creative Commons Attribution only licence CC BY 4.0

“Voicemail has 1 new message. Please dial 121”.

For some reason, probably lodged deep within my psyche, this innocuous text message never fails to fill me with dread. I’m usually getting on with my day quite happily and then… Someone needs to talk to me. I have no idea who it might be. They will probably want me to do something. Or at least need me to call them back. It could be urgent. Maybe it’s bad news.

In an instant my blissful, carefree world is punctured by a nagging doubt; a psychological stone in my shoe.

I avoid listening to the message for as long as a can, keeping my attention on the kids and pretending that I can get on with life for a few more hours as though nothing had changed. But I can’t help not knowing.

Inevitably I give in and listen. Continue reading

The trouble with me: breastfeeding and being a stay-at-home dad

Back in November in my first blog post, why I’m taking six months off work to look after my kids, I talked about some of the reasons for me deciding to take shared parental leave. One of those reasons was that I hoped it would give me a chance to be an equal parent alongside my wife. Without wanting to sound too sanctimonious about it, the idea that I would head off to work every day while leaving all the childcare stuff to her never seemed quite right. I didn’t want my role to be a bit-part: I wanted to be in the thick of it, getting my hands dirty (often quite literally). Continue reading